Hello, and greetings from Ecuador,
I have some sad news to pass on: María Herrera died on Saturday, December 3. She leaves 3 sons (Abimael, 18, Steven, 12, Sebastian, 9) and her husband Jimmi.
You may remember that we had helped to financially support María with her cancer treatment back in 2020, joining with a fundraising program in the pueblo of Chontal.
She had auxiliary kidney illness, but began her treatments in 2020, finally finishing the first round that year. She traveled to Quito for treatment and often stayed there for several days at a time with relatives. She returned to treatments in 2021 and 2022, and had become very thin and spent most time in bed. When secondary effects from the treatment, like swelling in her right leg and others, put the treatments on pause 5 months ago, the tumor was apparently under control. Although she still spent much of her time in bed, she said she felt very good, except for the discomfort in her leg. She remained very thin, and had a limited diet.
Whenever in Chontal, I visited María once a week, and when I was in Boston, I would text or call every now and then. After moving to Mindo last month, I would visit her each time I returned to Chontal, and we would pray together with her family. She said she still felt great.
Last week, she moved to her childhood home, across a bridge up the mountain. One of her sons now lived in Quito, the other two kids were often out of the house, and her husband Jimmi worked every day for 12-day streteches. Her mother Beatrice was her primary caregiver, and it made sense to move in with her. The kids would go there after school, and Jimmi would pick them up after work to bring them home.
She was feeling excellent, eating more and getting around more. But suddenly on Friday evening, she suddenly entered into a semi-conscious state while in bed, and Saturday mid-day she passed away.
Her funeral was Sunday at 4pm in the church, followed by her internment in the new cemetery. The wake started later in the day on Saturday, in her parents’ house where she died. It went all night, as is the custom here, until the casket was carried down the path on the hill, across the foot bridge, and up the road to the church.
I caught the first bus from Mindo to Chontal when I found out, and was able to spend many hours at the wake, assisting with the prayer service, and later with a reading at the Mass, accompanying especially Jimmi along the way. Afterwards, I was invited to the family house to start the novena of rosaries, and returned to the pueblo at night.
As you can imagine, it’s a sad time for many, and especially for her sons and Jimmi, and her parents. But there has been a long time of preparation, and that helps a little.
I remember one time I was on a video call with María back when I had just moved into my basement apartment. She was lying in bed, and could see the ductwork in my apartment in the background of the video. She said, “You deserve better than that!” My response was along the lines of, “If you’re going to be close to Jesus, you’re not going to be on the top comfortable floor. You’re going to be at the bottom.” María exemplified that vulnerability and powerlessness. I remember she would call out to the kids from her bed, as a mother. And in the same way, Jesus calls out to us from the cross. In many ways, when people visited, it was encounter with someone close to Jesus.
During her transition from someone healthy and energetic to someone mostly bed-ridden and sick, I saw her come out of her shell. She started to ask more about me, about how my hip was doing, what was going on. (We shared therapy techniques for our leg pains.) And she prayed, both privately, but now also together with her family, expressing her prayer in her own words. She also felt a connection to Guillermo, and always asked about him when I visited, mentioning how she also prays for him. I told Guillermo that, and he would pray for her, too.
Our hope for María is based in the promises of God in Christ, that he came to live our life so that we might live his, eternally:
This saying is trustworthy: If we have died with him, we shall also live with him. - 2 Tim 2:11
May María experience the “first fruits” of that life with Christ now, while we all await the final resurrection in the fullness of God’s family and kingdom. And, of course, as is commonly said here, we will all walk through the same journey. May we ourselves find our security in our communion in Christ with those who have gone before us, with those accompanying, and those who will follow.
I’ll continue to visit Jimmi and the family over time. I hope to be in contact soon with Abimael for English practice. And please keep María, Jimmi, and the whole family in your prayers. Thank you again to all who contributed with me to the direct support of their family, and who have also helped me to be here and present for them. May God bless us all, and bring us together finally as one family in Christ.
-Jerome